Traffic Wardens

The Red Coats are coming!
The Red Coats are coming!
They’re on their way!
I know I’m in trouble
They gona make me pay

When I see them walking about
With their little machines
I love to yell at them and shout
I know what that bloody sign means!

I needed to use the bank
Told them 5 mins is all I’d be
I know it was a taxi rank
They still put a ticket on me!

I’ll yell in their faces
And tell them where to go
I’ll do it in public places
To my red coated foe

And in car parks, they’re just as bad
Sneaking around, it makes me mad
Nasty gits, always looking mean
Hiding around corners, too late to be seen

Look, I swear I bought a ticket and I hadn’t gone far
When I turned around to see him, standing at my car
Tried to say, the wind must’ve blown it down
Got a “too late mate” from the red-coated clown!!!

I mean to say, it doesn’t make sense
Getting such a large fine
For the sake of a few pence
The sneaky Red Coat swine!

I got booked again the other day
Forgot to put the latest badge on display
I said “here listen, sorry ‘bout that mate”
“It’s my fault the badge was out of date”

Warden said “hey no sweat let’s see what I can do”
And what he did next proved his word to be true
For when I showed him the badge from my other car
I won my appeal, thanks to my red-coated star

They even keep the loading bays free
For cars and trucks, to unload
Cause it really bothers me
To carry heavy stuff up the road

They are professional and polite
And very hard working
They never rise to the fight
That people are provoking

And here’s a little known fact
That some may not know
If the wardens failed to act
Our town would not grow

For poor parking would quickly spread
And the roads would start to clog
Shops would soon be dead
Because of the parking backlog

So listen up, and this is true
They are under-appreciated
Most people haven’t a clue
Just how much they are truly needed!

Published by

CelticWolfe

I am someone who has spent the last 30yrs living with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) as a result of being a Victim/Survivor of 'The Troubles' in Northern Ireland. I am a fossil collector, avid reader, writer and photographer. I enjoy spending time with my family and spending days, and nights, out exploring the wonders of this little Emerald Isle.

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